Only If

When the world gets too heavy put it on my back, I'll be your levy. You are taking me apart like bad glue on a get well card. It was always you falling for me. Now there's always time calling for me. I'm the Light blinking at the end of the road. Blink back to let me know. I'm a Fly that's trapped in a web. But I'm thinking that my spider's dead. Lonely, lonely little life. I could kid myself by thinking that I'm fine. That I'm skin and bone. Just a cane and rusty throne. All the castle's under siege. But the sign outside says leave me alone.
-Panic! at the Disco

I love this song. Everyone does. But have you ever asked how if you're on that position?

I am now the Fly. I let myself trapped in a web only for the Spider. But actually he's dead. And I'm alone, only on my own. I never felt this pain before. A pain of vain. I won't let me deceive myself. People may say that a great woman can put a smile on her face, act like everything is fine, even when there's a big scar in her heart. Fake.
I know I'm not great.
I let the world know how terrible it hurt me. I thought, when I only pretend that I'm fine despite say the truth, then I'm not even strong enough to face the reality--I still do.

When we try to be honest, even if by ignoring our highest pride, sometimes, they will reward us even more.
My spider isn't dead. It's just misguided and I am gonna find it as soon as my wings could flutter. You know I know you're there. :)

About the image, remember something? Severus Snape? Me to.
Yes, it's not my own 'story'


  1. i think thats harry potter's father's
    th blue onee.. if i didnt miss

  2. nay! it's severus snape's.
    he loved lily (harry's mom) madly, but lily loved james (harry's pap), the man snape hate the most!
    and that's y snape's animagus and lily's are definitely the same.

  3. Replies
    1. the patronus! female deers? yes

  4. snape's patronus is the female one
    james' is male
    both of them are deer

    1. ah! sorry! i mean the patronus -_- yes. the female deers :) thanks nana!

    2. you're welcome :)